I've posted few simple questions to myself. Each time I ask myself, there is no exact answer. Just exactly what kind of a friend am I who worth the time of my friends? Are the friends around me the most sincere one or just way-to-go-for-fun friends?

A person surrounded with many people may not be the happiest but the person with only several people might owns the happiness.

Did revolution took place or I took them too lightly in me?

To be frank, I got no answer to it. Right now in my mind, I can no longer extinguish people from good or bad; nor I have the rights to. Is this Karma or things which I've never realized? Or, I overlook it? Or I'm being taken for granted. Which possibilities were right? No one knows.

Don't have to sound profile. Is all my hard feels.

To a special friend whom I've not visited for long, I'm sorry. The hardest thing that I have to take was the fact that you were gone. Til today, not sure if busy were my excuse or I can never face the burning pain whenever each time I look at you. Flashback occurred many times, none of them fail to make me miss you. Is true! So even when no one knows, I hope you do.

I was once there, to be like you. Exploring every little thing that could be on this Earth. Someone taught me this; ... I will be the one to experience it for you even if you can't and that would be the greatest thing you ever wished. But now, someone who taught me this is gone either. What am I to do by myself?

You lead me to doubts and darkness. A place where I even needs to doubt myself. What's love... Love for the sake of loving or once loved? I'm overwhelmed by it or you turn to the side I've never met.

To friends who are with me all these while, what had I done to them? What I know; I know nothing when you're in trouble. When you're in the deepest pit, hoping that someone was there for you, can you find me? What can I say? Nothing left for me to judge.

And to friends who only thought of me when they are in need, for fun and laughter.. Who needs me more than anyone else? A friend in need or a friend with fun? There's too many division of me.. Perhaps all these leads me to nothing.

Now I'm in a place with people of unknown heart, what am I suppose to do? What could be the best of me trying to pull everything back in place? Just as you read, I'm this messy; confused. I don't expect you to understand, but I still hope you do.