君は僕の

Did not notice when I started burying my sadness.
I don't bring them out as often anymore.
He came along, he taught me how to cast it a side.
Now he's gone, I'm used to it, no longer I feel so hurt.
I've learn. Learn the way to bury your sadness.

It just come to my sense that my dear bro had left for 20 months.
Never a day passed I've failed to miss him.
I know and I feel the pain of losing someone.
Its unbearable.

For 19 months, I had not visited you.
This is not because I don't wanna see you or you've been remove from my life.
I just can't take the fact to see your face at one unfamiliar place.
Is a blow that I can never take.
I choose not to think about it even up til now.
Wishing to see you yet not wanting to.
Get how that feels?

Is exactly when both sides of your hands are burnt and not knowing what to do.
Until it recover one day..

Today, a show just cast on tv and it reminds me of him.
I cried, not because the show is sad.
That happens because I totally feel the pain of losing someone.

Someone who you might not even be able to talk to for the rest of your life.
For the voice that you heard is gotta stop.
For the things you've did, its not going to happen anymore.
He step into my life showing how weakling live is.
I pray hard that no one is going to leave me for the next moment.
Because it has turned into a fear.

Perhaps that explains why I teared why friends of mine say goodbye.

I hate Goodbyes. No more byes I would say.
Also, that's one of the reason why I hate to say Bye to people whom I loved deeply.
Because it just seems like tomorrow is not gotta come.
Why can't we always say see you later?

Bid with a bright smile.
Not a wave.

Now, people in my life walks in and out.
Be in they're kicking alive or lying, I don't want any to happen anymore.
So dear friends, I really want to say how much I can't live without you people.
Even family. Please be healthy, be around me to keep me safe and sound.
That's all I ask for. Don't walk out on me anymore.

Because being alone feeling helpless feels exactly when the doom day is here.